Ballmer Admits Brainwashing his Family

Thursday, Mar. 30 2006 | Author: Griffith

Microsoft’s CEO, Steve Ballmer, admits that he has brainwashed his family and doesn’t allow any products from competitors in his household.

When he was asked in a recent interview whether he owned an iPod or not (sheesh, journalists sure luuuuv to ask this question) he answered:

“No, I do not,” he replied. “Nor do my children. My children–in many dimensions they’re as poorly behaved as many other children, but at least on this dimension I’ve got my kids brainwashed: You don’t use Google, and you don’t use an iPod.”

Not using an iPod is bearable. “Painful”, but bearable. But not being able to use Google… now that’s just cold.

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13 Responses for "Ballmer Admits Brainwashing his Family"

jangelo

March 30th, 2006 at 2:57 pm
1

“Not using an iPod is bearable. “Painful”, but bearable. But not being able to use Google… now that’s just cold.”

I wouldn’t survive!

Anyway, what email provider does he have his kids use? Hotmail?!?
Griffith

March 30th, 2006 at 3:08 pm
2

I don’t which one they have, but it’s certainly not Yahoo or Gmail ;)
David

March 30th, 2006 at 3:46 pm
3

Best article ever!
Conglacio

March 30th, 2006 at 4:17 pm
4

Trans dimensional children?
Kenada

March 30th, 2006 at 5:40 pm
5

It doesn’t matter they’re loaded, they don’t need to use Google. They can do it the old fashioned way, by using msn *smirk*.
Michael

March 30th, 2006 at 9:53 pm
6

What about letting his kids play Nintendo?
jangelo

March 30th, 2006 at 10:59 pm
7

Hmm … maybe he was saying that in jest. I mean, I’d let my kids use the competition’s product if it were really good.
Griffith

March 31st, 2006 at 3:23 am
8

@jangelo: I don’t know if I would the same in his shoes. If you were the manufacturer for some product it wouldn’t be good publicity for your own kids to advertise your opponent’s.

In the end it would be more ridiculous for him and his company if his kids did use iPods or Macs.
jangelo

March 31st, 2006 at 4:03 am
9

But you could use iPods with Windows. And it’s not like people would recognize you using Google when you’re walking on the street. :)
Griffith

March 31st, 2006 at 5:14 am
10

You can use iPods with Windows, but Microsoft has their own media devices known as PMPs with their special Media OS. That’s why I said not using an iPod was bearable but not using Google was ridiculous.
jangelo

March 31st, 2006 at 5:55 am
11

Ah, yes, the MS-based media players. At any rate, Steve’s kids are likely rich enough they won’t bother to get iPods. They can get all the Microsoft-powered equipment they want!

As for Google, well, I can just imagine Steve telling his kids not to click on any AdSense ads!
M@t Hoffman

March 31st, 2006 at 10:55 am
12

I think his children are aliens
Mark

April 1st, 2006 at 4:52 am
13

Can you imagine what this must be like? Knowing:

a) their Dad is one of the most universally ridiculed idiots on the planet;

b) that their myopic father is responsible for some of the flakiest products ever made

c) that however crap his products are, you’ll be forced to use them, while all your mates get small, cool, reliable stuff

Jeez, that must be really tough. Billionaire or not, I know what I’d prefer - the latitude to think for myself.